Stranger Things.
Strange things have been happening lately. Stranger than normal, that is.
I honestly don't even know what to think about what has been happening to me lately. The more I think about it, the more I feel like it just can't be real. I know it is real, though. That's the part that scares me most. I don't even know where to begin. I guess I'll start with a week or so ago, maybe two.
Until today, I didn't think this was important, but now I'm realizing it wasn't normal at all. The other day, I decided to take the elevator from the third floor to the first floor at school (I know...I should have taken the stairs...but sometimes I just feel like being alone in the elevator - that, and not walking) Anyway, I got in the elevator, and I don't really remember what happened, but I remember being extremely confused and feeling like everything kind of spun around. It only lasted a second and it was almost like I blacked out. I didn't even realize it. It was like time fast-forwarded in that moment and suddenly I had lost that time and didn't really know what had happened. I could have sworn I pressed the "1" button, and the elevator moved (I think) and I got out, and walked out in kind of a daze and I remember walking through the halls thinking "I didn't realize the first floor got a room like this" when I walked past a study room like one they have in the third floor. Until I got to the second floor landing (which I had to walk down 2 flights of stairs to get to) I had no clue I wasn't on the first floor. It was so weird. Then I snapped out of it. I've walked the halls of the first floor a bazillion times. I should have known immediately that I wasn't stepping out onto the first floor, but I didn't. I wasn't texting or reading anything. I was just in this weird trance. I kind of laughed it off, but I remember thinking that I was losing my mind. Not a fun feeling.
Well, I had a similar experience yesterday and the day before.
Tuesday, Randy and I came home and decided we needed to take a nap, so we did. It was awesome.
Except I didn't get up...
Randy tried to wake me up, but I just started talking in my sleep (sort of) and I started rattling off nonsense. I was babbling incoherently and laughing uncontrollably. It was insane. I remember it vaguely and it was like I was kind of in a daze, trapped in my sleepy state. It was weird. Randy said I sounded crazy. He said I kept talking about Stockholm? And that it was "really funny." I've always been a sleep talker, but this was a little different. I remember this, and I remember just not being able to get up.
As if that wasn't bad enough, I slept 18 hours. Some nap!!! The worst part: I was still tired when I got up in the morning!
Later that day, (Wednesday) I also had a weird attack of a similar episode. I had a sudden pain in my head that lasted just for 10 seconds or so, but it was a normal pain that I've felt before...then, I felt really strange for a few hours after. I was shaky for about 30 minutes, but I just felt really uneasy for a long time. I'm not really sure what's going on. I ran into a friend of mine and he was so freaked out that he would barely leave my sight. He was like, "are you sure you don't need me to walk you somewhere?" I don't think he would have left my side except I had to go to the bathroom, haha.
Maybe we'll get this figured out one of these days...
Also, I'm praying I don't end up in the hospital in the next 24 hours...I've been mentioning that my kidneys were acting up, right? Well, last night Randy and I were watching our favorite show, DUCK DYNASTY!!! And my left kidney (area) was been in EXCRUCIATING pain from about 9:30. I took a HEAVY pain pill, but I was still hurting pretty badly. It's alarming. Maybe I should have gone to the ER, but I'm seriously sick of the ER. Seriously. Best case scenario, it's just another kidney stone. It has been irritated this morning, but not as bad as last night, so maybe I won't have to go to the hospital today! :) yay!
I'm going to Dr. P's tomorrow, though. I called him about my semi-blackout's and he called back and was like, "come in. NOW."
Also, I have started having a backup alarm for my medicine because I keep turning my alarm off and forgetting my medicine (stupid memory!). So now I have an alarm at 6 that says "MEDICINE!!!" and an alarm at 6:30 that says "Did you take your medicine?!?!?!?!" :) Smart, no? I'm thinking it'll work. If nothing else, I have a husband who is frustrated by my medicine forgetfulness lately :) so he's helping. So he's my 3rd alarm! Love you, hubs!
I'm feeling oddly stressed and calm, which I know must be the Lord's grace.
However, I still just want things to be normal for once. I don't want to be "that girl." This is all so stressful. I know it's just adding to my story, but some days I wish it was a different book, or maybe a different chapter at least? I wouldn't change my life in that I love my friends and family, especially my precious husband, but I hate being on the phone with doctors every 5 seconds. I hate getting doctor bills in the mail every day. I hate taking 10 pills a day (not an exaggeration). Things could always, always be worse. I know I have to be grateful for the health I do have because I know some people have it worse than I do, but I'm tired. Randy is tired. We just want peace.
Lord, can we have peace? Please?
p.s. I know you're probably sick of crazy things, but this blog is meant to be an update for friends/family/anyone who wants to stay updated and as a memory blog for Randy and I...so sorry! Love you anyway :)
I honestly don't even know what to think about what has been happening to me lately. The more I think about it, the more I feel like it just can't be real. I know it is real, though. That's the part that scares me most. I don't even know where to begin. I guess I'll start with a week or so ago, maybe two.
Until today, I didn't think this was important, but now I'm realizing it wasn't normal at all. The other day, I decided to take the elevator from the third floor to the first floor at school (I know...I should have taken the stairs...but sometimes I just feel like being alone in the elevator - that, and not walking) Anyway, I got in the elevator, and I don't really remember what happened, but I remember being extremely confused and feeling like everything kind of spun around. It only lasted a second and it was almost like I blacked out. I didn't even realize it. It was like time fast-forwarded in that moment and suddenly I had lost that time and didn't really know what had happened. I could have sworn I pressed the "1" button, and the elevator moved (I think) and I got out, and walked out in kind of a daze and I remember walking through the halls thinking "I didn't realize the first floor got a room like this" when I walked past a study room like one they have in the third floor. Until I got to the second floor landing (which I had to walk down 2 flights of stairs to get to) I had no clue I wasn't on the first floor. It was so weird. Then I snapped out of it. I've walked the halls of the first floor a bazillion times. I should have known immediately that I wasn't stepping out onto the first floor, but I didn't. I wasn't texting or reading anything. I was just in this weird trance. I kind of laughed it off, but I remember thinking that I was losing my mind. Not a fun feeling.
Well, I had a similar experience yesterday and the day before.
Tuesday, Randy and I came home and decided we needed to take a nap, so we did. It was awesome.
Except I didn't get up...
Randy tried to wake me up, but I just started talking in my sleep (sort of) and I started rattling off nonsense. I was babbling incoherently and laughing uncontrollably. It was insane. I remember it vaguely and it was like I was kind of in a daze, trapped in my sleepy state. It was weird. Randy said I sounded crazy. He said I kept talking about Stockholm? And that it was "really funny." I've always been a sleep talker, but this was a little different. I remember this, and I remember just not being able to get up.
As if that wasn't bad enough, I slept 18 hours. Some nap!!! The worst part: I was still tired when I got up in the morning!
Later that day, (Wednesday) I also had a weird attack of a similar episode. I had a sudden pain in my head that lasted just for 10 seconds or so, but it was a normal pain that I've felt before...then, I felt really strange for a few hours after. I was shaky for about 30 minutes, but I just felt really uneasy for a long time. I'm not really sure what's going on. I ran into a friend of mine and he was so freaked out that he would barely leave my sight. He was like, "are you sure you don't need me to walk you somewhere?" I don't think he would have left my side except I had to go to the bathroom, haha.
Maybe we'll get this figured out one of these days...
Also, I'm praying I don't end up in the hospital in the next 24 hours...I've been mentioning that my kidneys were acting up, right? Well, last night Randy and I were watching our favorite show, DUCK DYNASTY!!! And my left kidney (area) was been in EXCRUCIATING pain from about 9:30. I took a HEAVY pain pill, but I was still hurting pretty badly. It's alarming. Maybe I should have gone to the ER, but I'm seriously sick of the ER. Seriously. Best case scenario, it's just another kidney stone. It has been irritated this morning, but not as bad as last night, so maybe I won't have to go to the hospital today! :) yay!I'm going to Dr. P's tomorrow, though. I called him about my semi-blackout's and he called back and was like, "come in. NOW."
Also, I have started having a backup alarm for my medicine because I keep turning my alarm off and forgetting my medicine (stupid memory!). So now I have an alarm at 6 that says "MEDICINE!!!" and an alarm at 6:30 that says "Did you take your medicine?!?!?!?!" :) Smart, no? I'm thinking it'll work. If nothing else, I have a husband who is frustrated by my medicine forgetfulness lately :) so he's helping. So he's my 3rd alarm! Love you, hubs!
I'm feeling oddly stressed and calm, which I know must be the Lord's grace.
However, I still just want things to be normal for once. I don't want to be "that girl." This is all so stressful. I know it's just adding to my story, but some days I wish it was a different book, or maybe a different chapter at least? I wouldn't change my life in that I love my friends and family, especially my precious husband, but I hate being on the phone with doctors every 5 seconds. I hate getting doctor bills in the mail every day. I hate taking 10 pills a day (not an exaggeration). Things could always, always be worse. I know I have to be grateful for the health I do have because I know some people have it worse than I do, but I'm tired. Randy is tired. We just want peace.
Lord, can we have peace? Please?
p.s. I know you're probably sick of crazy things, but this blog is meant to be an update for friends/family/anyone who wants to stay updated and as a memory blog for Randy and I...so sorry! Love you anyway :)
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