Forgetfulness

I'm forgetting everything these days.

It was bad before my diagnosis because I was in this really bad fog all the time that completely drained me of all of my energy, memory, and just about everything else. Since I've been on my medication, the fog has been lifted and I actually feel like living life again, which is awesome! I mean, it constantly felt like I had this vice around my brain and it was like any thought or emotion was a HUGE task. It was awful, so I'm really glad that's gone, but now I have a terribly memory and my concentration is at an all-time low. Imagine waking up in the middle of your life and you suddenly have A.D.D! It's a tradeoff...I think I'm winning? It sure is rough, though.
It kind of feels like a copout when I feel bad. Lately it has been even worse, so that has been difficult. I have felt drained, but I still feel emotions, so that's an improvement from before even if I am feeling tired!

Anyway, it struck again today. I forgot my medicine AGAIN yesterday afternoon, so I'll keep you posted on what happens. I'm really praying nothing happens, but yesterday afternoon (prior to medicine time) was already pretty bad. I even have an alarm on my phone, but sometime life gets in the way and I can't get to it immediately :/ ugghhh.

Around 3pm, I started having kind of shooting pains in my head, similar to the last time I had a really bad seizure. It seriously feels like nails are being shot into my head in various places. It would only last for a split second every time it hit, but WOW, it was awful every time. I've also been really twitchy, which is never good on the nerves front. Last time I forgot my medicine it wasn't so bad, so maybe my body will cut me some slack! Here's hoping! In any case, prayers would be lovely because the stabbing feeling in my head is back! Last night I also had some difficulty, so I'm praying tonight goes well. My seizures tend to get worse when I'm tired :(
I have a friend with epilepsy and she told me her symptoms get worse with stress and a lack of sleep and I have definitely noticed the same is true for me, but it is really difficult for me to maintain those with my schedule these days.


Good news: I finally got the name and number of the neurologist I mentioned, so hopefully I'll get an appointment soon! I'm super excited!!!



I'm pretty sure I had other things to mention as well, but I forgot :(
Another day, I suppose!



I'm not sure what will happen, but God definitely has a plan in all of this. I am definitely feeling weak these days, though. My kidneys hurt (still haven't heard back about that), I am absolutely exhausted no matter how long I sleep, I'm really frustrated about my memory, but I have confidence in the Lord. It's insanely difficult, but I know He will bring us through the storm. If you're reading this and would like to pray for us, we would definitely ask for strength during this time. We're definitely running low these days. We're both so tired.
My husband is an awesome provider, though. I'm so thankful for him. Please pray for him specifically. I know it must get exhausting living with someone as many medical problems, but he has been so supportive and wonderful. He is a great man. I love him so much!


Thanks so much for reading!